I meant in two days I'll get on a real keyboard and elaborate. It's a wonder I'm not trying to type all this with my thumbs, and also a wonder how quickly we adapted to utilizing our unique little assets on the edges of our hands to typing. . .wonders abound.
Not to leave out the wonder of all that is happening now. Well, I've driven the bus downtown two days in a row to get paneling - the first was much too flimsy. It was a nice little story and example of having what we need with some faith and trust - and then realizing when we got back and Matthew begin cutting it with a jigsaw, and the crap smelled like a pizza box and fell apart with a saw. . .well, it was a good little check for Matthew and a good check for my guilty ego who felt unable to provide anything worth working with. . .Both of us recovered and after a day of work and a full day of rain, Matthew got to work on the panels (the better, much more expensive ones that we went back for Saturday) this afternoon while Mercury and I made a craft run and I found some awesome Sharpie oil-based paint pens. . .oh yeah, if the right people show up Friday for our sendoff party, we'll get some pleasant details on the bus done. . .
There seems to be a theme in what comes up weekly in my everyday conversations with people, everybody - concerning the trip. Also, I dislike calling it a trip. We're not falling, we're not taking a vacation - it's just the next year for us. . .so I'll start referring to it as that - the next year. Ok, so - the theme as of the last few days has been once again funding, and I cannot scientifically explain or logically persuade anyone to believe me, but somehow it just always works out. And that's why I'm not banging my head against the wall or losing my cool when the ibook died, or when I get a 5% tip on a table at work. . .I trust, believe, and certainly don't stand idle, but I don't panic either, and hey - I think of all those folks out there that don't have kids because they can't afford them, but I have three and literally make less then anyone I know, single, married, or with kids! My kids enjoy grand lives. It doesn't add up, but actually, yes it does. . .
We have re-defined the good things in life, the necessity, the prizes, the goals. Well, I have, and then I teach them rather - and sometimes it's the other way around, yes, that's true. It's about to get much more nitty gritty on the road, but we all talk about it - you don't take anything with you to your grave, right? Store your treasure up in heaven, right? Sell your things and follow me (Christ), right? Let go or be dragged, right? Boy, if we can't see where that happiness is when we are with our loved ones, standing there with them, in the rain, in the sun, in the car, across the table - man, we all need to check ourselves.
Being a server at a lakeside restaurant, I see many people come in from the lake, already a bit warmed up from the sun and some beer, socially lubricated from either or both, happy for whatever it counts. Then there are people, couples even, who look as if it's a pain to have to go out to eat. It's a chore to sit with familiar people to them, be served food, it's all so difficult. How we've lost touch! And they have to complain and take their antidepressants and sit sadly silent or quietly abrasive, then they leave a poor tip and depart in a car far newer and quieter and nicer smelling then mine has ever been, with a scowl on their faces. I don't think life should be this way. I think back to some good movies - Office Space and Shawn of the Dead - people are zombies - they work droning and deadening jobs for things that aren't necessity, but dont' have the time or energy to break out of the cycle long enough to realize it's not necessity!
So! How will I pay for the next year? I don't know. I mean, I have some ideas - a funding website, I am still getting foodstamps plenty enough until December, when I re-apply (a touchy subject for many, most of whom are very hard-working middle class who have never been on welfare and can't understand anyone needing it unless they are lazy. For many, welfare indicates laziness. I hope you don't think that, now. . .), applying for grants, the veggie oil will help out in actual locomotion, getting a small portable printer and taking some portraits from my iphone and printing them out on the spot for a few bucks, and child support (hahahaha). Also seeing if I can get a little gig in Philly for a couple of weeks for some cash while I'm there. It's not as if I have nothing to go on. . .if you could see the plans I had (or didn't) to survive the last 2 winters alone, you wouldn't be shaking your head right now. Sponsors are always welcome, and once we're on the road, hanging our heads and hands out in the northern winds and spreading our goofiness and innocent trust around a lot more people, well, I have an idea we'll catch someone's eye. After all that has been given to us in way of food, shelter, friends, health, and love - well, there's not much more that you have a taste for after that good stuff. Who wants fillers if you've had a quality meal? Things and Blings are fillers. Love is the perfect food. And trust is the utensil that brings it to our mouths. HA!
No comments:
Post a Comment