View from bathroom to kitchen
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| Mercury painting |
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
no need for flowery s@#%
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Did I mention the documentary photographic essay of our lives in motion?
Peter Ford's bus in North Carolina - don't let the exterior fool you - it had a giant flat screen TV, leather couch, and is fully converted to veggie oil. Peter gave us the run-down on his system and has been available by phone anytime. Yeah, central cool is right. . .
Ez at an archery lesson, Cub Scout campout - thanks Finnessee for taking the boys. The community I have here already is amazing.
Me and Ezekiel at the ice cream shop inside the original small town cinema - we prefer supporting that and the drive in across the street then the newest cinematic technology. . .
Here's my Matthew and me
Mercury in the bus, keeping me company as I wash the ceilings in preparation for painting.
Mercury and her new sister, Haley
Samson and I found a tomato hornworm moth in our kitchen one morning this summer. This took up most of the morning.
Samson in an Asheville cafe before we visited Peter's bus nearby.
This poster was hanging above Samson at the cafe. It was an auspicious sign, shortly before our meeting with Peter. It also describes our family to a tee. Absurdist being the first adjective. . .
The Ridiculous Banana Waffle Argument
Night three just ended of horrendous sleep quality. Only one child was restless enough to come into bed with me (again) although I heard 2 of them talking in their sleep and Mercury was scared enough of the previous night's nightmare that she slept in the top bunk in the boys' room. . .last night it was Matthew who was up, in a seemingly constant state of panic throughout the night. Wow, there's alot of tension and anxiety in the air around here. I plan on alleviating some of that by making the bus pretty today. I am going to finish painting the walls yellow and the little spots on the ceiling and in between the windows a wonderfully calming blue, and giving my mom the material to sew the curtains, and installing the curtain rods. That's a do-list that I can accomplish for sure in a day. . .
Right now I am still standing my ground that the waffles the boys are eating do NOT have bananas in them. Samson is adamant about his theory. I will see, THEN I will paint. . .
Here are photos I took last week. I have so many photos and videos, but the old G4 I bought off craigslist to replace my shot one is sadly insufficient for video - I'm realizing everytime I pick this up how I got what I paid for. . .little glitches, no DVD player (holy cow!), not enough disk space to upload video or photos, and for some reason it is exceedingly difficult to download photos from my email. With all this technology, it would seem getting photos on a blog should be easier. And bam - there's my complaining done for the day - I've reached my ceiling on whining. . Here's to a finished paint job today! And berry waffles!
Right now I am still standing my ground that the waffles the boys are eating do NOT have bananas in them. Samson is adamant about his theory. I will see, THEN I will paint. . .
Here are photos I took last week. I have so many photos and videos, but the old G4 I bought off craigslist to replace my shot one is sadly insufficient for video - I'm realizing everytime I pick this up how I got what I paid for. . .little glitches, no DVD player (holy cow!), not enough disk space to upload video or photos, and for some reason it is exceedingly difficult to download photos from my email. With all this technology, it would seem getting photos on a blog should be easier. And bam - there's my complaining done for the day - I've reached my ceiling on whining. . Here's to a finished paint job today! And berry waffles!
Mercury took this of me last week, washing the ceiling before painting. Here's the framed out bunks, loft, kitchen on the right and bathroom on the left. The bathroom is just the composting toilet - I have a solar shower that will hang outside. Giving up baths is going to be one of the most difficult transitions for the kids. . .
Figured I'd at least put some sort of exterior photo since I painted it white last fall. . .a blank canvas for artists we meet on the road and in the communities, to represent our nation-wide and even global community through art - a traveling reminder of community. . .
This is the blue that I am painting the ceiling - this was last week as I was doing it. It's all blue now.
Monday, August 8, 2011
And then there was five
I've been busy. It's been a scant summer for posting, and I've learned my lesson - that this neglect cannot continue, but I still find myself distracted by other things. . .this ruby engagement ring on my finger - the finger that forgot how to type. . .and I've had a difficult time re-arranging my entire last 3 or 4 years' ideas into including a husband/partner. The first few words describing this blog state 'single parent family'. It's a strange and bittersweet metamorphosis, for all. There is heavy energy in the house as we enter into the dawn of the last week here. It's about 30 minutes before sunrise and I was awoken by Samson about 2 hours ago with his nightmares, thankful that he woke me from mine. I couldn't rest enough to dose back off, with everything stirring in my head. We have to be out of this house by August 15, then we are taking 2 weeks (or more) to finish up details on the bus while we stay with friends in the town next door. Sounds simple. But like I said, I've been distracted. . .
Matthew proposed to me 8 days ago. We have a quick history, but I have also been granted a gift of sensitivity and response when it comes to the truth. . .and though I try my best to deny the truth many times, I can't fight it, and after talking about what sense it would make both logically and passionately (yes, you can make passionate sense, it's wonderful) to get married a few months ago - I ran! Then what would you know but God's funny fate brought us back around to meet up after initial tests of honesty and intent were passed. . .the last 2 months with this man have been amazing - from pettily refusing to shift my concept as a single parent family, to agreeing having Matthew join us, then having 3 hour phone conversations every night when he visited family in California for a week, to changing my leave date, to changing OUR leave date, to missing him while I'm at a 5 hour work shift. Now I sit in the quiet, the growing dawn, while my dear children and dear husband-to-be slumber peacefully, wondering how this new logic will fit into my stubborn and independent attitude, and being humbly amazed how much I needed him to shake it up, a stark realization that the community I seek I sometimes push away for fear my strength and recognition will be diluted.
This dawn that's crawling up the damp mint outside those french doors that I can't claim anymore, this dawn seems to be lighting more then the outside world. It's guiding me to clarity and acceptance and a bounty of thankfulness I had given up on long ago. I'll raise my coffee to a toast - here's to all the grudge work procrastination has led me to in our final week, to friends grander then platinum for sure, and that I can now proudly say 'we' and 'our' includes a man, my man. . .
And there is my excuse - my wonderful, wonderful, wonderful excuse that is almost as good as calling out of work because you've got the runs - it ALWAYS works - I fell in love and nothing else has been quite as important as staring into his eyes. There's not much that can be multi-tasked in conjunction with that effort. But his eyes are still closed as I type, and there-in have I found my time again.
Tomorrow Dave is coming up from Asheville to convert the bus while we learn and do what we're told. We plan on 2 days to add the veggie oil fuel system. Then it's some major crunch time moving furniture around to friends' houses, finishing up the painting in the bus AND the house, the dividing walls, the sink, patching the roof, making this yard presentable, driving the 11 year old cat up to meet Jay in DC after work friday night, and driving back in time for work Saturday evening, and living on the bus in one week from today. Dang. Oh, and in the middle of all that, I turn 33. What a perfect number. That, or 5.
Matthew proposed to me 8 days ago. We have a quick history, but I have also been granted a gift of sensitivity and response when it comes to the truth. . .and though I try my best to deny the truth many times, I can't fight it, and after talking about what sense it would make both logically and passionately (yes, you can make passionate sense, it's wonderful) to get married a few months ago - I ran! Then what would you know but God's funny fate brought us back around to meet up after initial tests of honesty and intent were passed. . .the last 2 months with this man have been amazing - from pettily refusing to shift my concept as a single parent family, to agreeing having Matthew join us, then having 3 hour phone conversations every night when he visited family in California for a week, to changing my leave date, to changing OUR leave date, to missing him while I'm at a 5 hour work shift. Now I sit in the quiet, the growing dawn, while my dear children and dear husband-to-be slumber peacefully, wondering how this new logic will fit into my stubborn and independent attitude, and being humbly amazed how much I needed him to shake it up, a stark realization that the community I seek I sometimes push away for fear my strength and recognition will be diluted.
This dawn that's crawling up the damp mint outside those french doors that I can't claim anymore, this dawn seems to be lighting more then the outside world. It's guiding me to clarity and acceptance and a bounty of thankfulness I had given up on long ago. I'll raise my coffee to a toast - here's to all the grudge work procrastination has led me to in our final week, to friends grander then platinum for sure, and that I can now proudly say 'we' and 'our' includes a man, my man. . .
And there is my excuse - my wonderful, wonderful, wonderful excuse that is almost as good as calling out of work because you've got the runs - it ALWAYS works - I fell in love and nothing else has been quite as important as staring into his eyes. There's not much that can be multi-tasked in conjunction with that effort. But his eyes are still closed as I type, and there-in have I found my time again.
Tomorrow Dave is coming up from Asheville to convert the bus while we learn and do what we're told. We plan on 2 days to add the veggie oil fuel system. Then it's some major crunch time moving furniture around to friends' houses, finishing up the painting in the bus AND the house, the dividing walls, the sink, patching the roof, making this yard presentable, driving the 11 year old cat up to meet Jay in DC after work friday night, and driving back in time for work Saturday evening, and living on the bus in one week from today. Dang. Oh, and in the middle of all that, I turn 33. What a perfect number. That, or 5.
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Time to make the most of it
So here I sit typing with my thumbs on my phone. This is the main reason I have not posted much in the last six weeks. Since my iBook bit the dust, the hand me down house pc died shortly thereafter, and I sadly realized today that the PowerBook I had been led to online, paid all the money (and even borrowed some) to purchase - well, it was a scam and that was an entire month ago that the transaction was made. Now it's some hassling around paypal to report the fraud and refund my meager $350. Which is a joke to find any decent apple laptop at that price. I'm more then a little depressed over th situations at hand recently - my main (only) help/worked on the bus - Matthew - has been gone to California for a week and will be busy with his own life upon return...we don't really know how to convert th fuel system, my ex-husband is in th hospital again after a ruptured appendix, battling some mysterious and very serious infection - causing me to question all - where is my faith and loyalty? Work was bizarrely slow last weekend - making about $200 in ny workweek and lacking even enough to pay the bills - I was paid one child support payment in th last three months, which totaled q third of one monthly payment. And obviously I can count on not receiving nay more payments fo at least a month...and feeling guilty that that perturbs me as jay lay ill in th hospital....
Now that I feel that negativity melting after getting most of my hinderances out in virtual ink, it's time to make th most of what I had and stop complaining about how difficult or impossible things seem -'things I tell my kids - just do it. Stop wasting your energy moaning about what we don't have and use your peers of resourcefulness to do the job. A computer would help but heck, look at this amazingthing in my hands, I just need to use my wit and learn to make it work fo m. Thank god for trial and Erie, how else would I be the mcgeyvor of mothers?? I'm meeting with an old hippie in NC Friday to ECM out his veggie oil converted international and trusting I can come up with the time and parts to recreate the conversion before the go date - now a solid August 7, even if that means driving it down the street until the conversion is com. Then unto Philly. Wfor now I'm on tubing for a decent apple laptop...for ch
Now that I feel that negativity melting after getting most of my hinderances out in virtual ink, it's time to make th most of what I had and stop complaining about how difficult or impossible things seem -'things I tell my kids - just do it. Stop wasting your energy moaning about what we don't have and use your peers of resourcefulness to do the job. A computer would help but heck, look at this amazingthing in my hands, I just need to use my wit and learn to make it work fo m. Thank god for trial and Erie, how else would I be the mcgeyvor of mothers?? I'm meeting with an old hippie in NC Friday to ECM out his veggie oil converted international and trusting I can come up with the time and parts to recreate the conversion before the go date - now a solid August 7, even if that means driving it down the street until the conversion is com. Then unto Philly. Wfor now I'm on tubing for a decent apple laptop...for ch
Monday, July 11, 2011
Who thought it could be so difficult?
To find time to make it to the library to catch this up. . .?
It's been ages since a new post, right? and to make things more awkward, my fingers are making me feel stupid - they have forgotten how to type on a full size keyboard - in a short month I have completely evolved (or de-volved) in a smart phone-thumb-typing fool. I'm sitting here in between two strangers (but sisters the same) in the public library trying not to make my surprise at the lack of dexterity in my typing skills obvious. . .
So the bus! Holy night how I am loving my house more and more. It's not even my house, but I'm falling in love with it. . .walking through at night while the kids sleep, the gradually opening spaces, shadows from night lights of street lights playing on the walls, the fans or the AC humming gently, oh yeah, did I mention the space? Meanwhile more things are getting boxed and stored or loaned to friends then I thought. . .I feel a slight failure in the total giving up of things. Though I have given my word to donate my car to a friend in need. I figure when I come back next fall the same will come back to me, in some fashion or another. Not gonna sweat it. . .I love how I can point to what God says in all of this seemingly very un-wise, completely un-planned next few years and say - see? he told us not to worry about tomorrow. . .
Also meanwhile, the bus is getting smaller. The bunks are in, the loft is in, the toilet is in, and today Matthew is working on the sink and counter top. We still have so much to do, and the time is short. The renters from Texas will be moving in August 15, but that doesn't give me the option to stay an extra 2 weeks because I know myself better then to accept that gift. . .nothing will get done until the last week. There is the roof hatches to be patched, but I need 2 full days of sun for that and our balmy Appalachian summer won't give it up without a grand thunderstorm right in the middle of the day. My friend Derrick the master welder has promised to weld on the thick metal I bought weeks ago to replace the broken back door glass. . .Locks must be installed, I've resorted to purchasing a wood stove in lieu of a rocket stove, which needs to be bought, the entire bus needs to be scrubbed, curtains made, some sort of seating - though it will be temporary - I am eventually investing in some safety seating for the kids that is forward facing and has seat belts. . .my brother is installing a cd player, my trucker friend Tiffany whom I haven't seen since college and who drove an hour and a half to see me for the party - she told me I must invest in a GPS, which she called by some trucker slang I've already forgotten. I learned alot that night, probably more then I wanted to, but certainly some stuff that will score me knowledge points at some junction in the future across this country.
So much to write about! Whew! Our family has been separated for the last 5 weeks - the boys were in NJ with their dad for three weeks, then because of un-mentioned situations, Jay could not drive them down on the set date, and he told me late the evening before - so because I couldn't make it another day without my boys, Matthew and I (I being the driver, but it's amazing the difference there is driving 10 hours solo with 3 kids and driving the same route with 1 kid and another adult. . .) booked it straight up to NJ, got the boys, left Mercury, and headed straight back down to TN. Less then 30 hours, and man - what a testimony to my kids' strength and flexibility and finesse. We crashed in a Maryland rest stop on the way back, and Ezekiel awoke at dawn shortly after I did, with the biggest smile on his face. These kids are meant for the crazy life. We had quite an adventurous journey back, all positive.
And now I am waiting for my new used powerbook i thing. I was corrected yesterday that it was indeed NOT an ibook. That was what died. Yet another little detour on my way out of here - I was blessed by being let go of my day job a month ago - it was not ideal anyway, and logistically, I probably wasn't even making any money considering the commute and the time with sitters. . .it was sudden and I texted my boss, telling her bluntly that it was inconsiderate to tell me that my job ended with only one day of warning. I received a check for 5 times what she owed me in the mail a few days later. That right there payed for my new used computer. The only problem is - the previous owner STILL hasn't mailed it, it being about 2 weeks overdue. Very frustrating, especially because I have so many photos and words to slap up here. And when it gets to be a three page post, you're going to get bored. But I guarantee that the last month has been anything but around here.
I've also been busy making eyes at Matthew. Which accounts for alot of 'lost' time. . .
I will be back at the library soon. For now I'm heading back home to freak out about leaving such a beautiful home. . .one of the nicest things at the end of a long road trip is knowing you have a shower and comfortable bed and AC and, oh yeah, space. . .I will admit this - it's seeming much more like a trial then an exciting prospect as the physical reality takes shape.
Oh, and there was the inccident of a failed attempt to recreate the shadows of some birch tree leaves on the bus at night with some Sharpie oil markers by Charlotte and Garret. . .sigh. Their hearts were in it. . .
It's been ages since a new post, right? and to make things more awkward, my fingers are making me feel stupid - they have forgotten how to type on a full size keyboard - in a short month I have completely evolved (or de-volved) in a smart phone-thumb-typing fool. I'm sitting here in between two strangers (but sisters the same) in the public library trying not to make my surprise at the lack of dexterity in my typing skills obvious. . .
So the bus! Holy night how I am loving my house more and more. It's not even my house, but I'm falling in love with it. . .walking through at night while the kids sleep, the gradually opening spaces, shadows from night lights of street lights playing on the walls, the fans or the AC humming gently, oh yeah, did I mention the space? Meanwhile more things are getting boxed and stored or loaned to friends then I thought. . .I feel a slight failure in the total giving up of things. Though I have given my word to donate my car to a friend in need. I figure when I come back next fall the same will come back to me, in some fashion or another. Not gonna sweat it. . .I love how I can point to what God says in all of this seemingly very un-wise, completely un-planned next few years and say - see? he told us not to worry about tomorrow. . .
Also meanwhile, the bus is getting smaller. The bunks are in, the loft is in, the toilet is in, and today Matthew is working on the sink and counter top. We still have so much to do, and the time is short. The renters from Texas will be moving in August 15, but that doesn't give me the option to stay an extra 2 weeks because I know myself better then to accept that gift. . .nothing will get done until the last week. There is the roof hatches to be patched, but I need 2 full days of sun for that and our balmy Appalachian summer won't give it up without a grand thunderstorm right in the middle of the day. My friend Derrick the master welder has promised to weld on the thick metal I bought weeks ago to replace the broken back door glass. . .Locks must be installed, I've resorted to purchasing a wood stove in lieu of a rocket stove, which needs to be bought, the entire bus needs to be scrubbed, curtains made, some sort of seating - though it will be temporary - I am eventually investing in some safety seating for the kids that is forward facing and has seat belts. . .my brother is installing a cd player, my trucker friend Tiffany whom I haven't seen since college and who drove an hour and a half to see me for the party - she told me I must invest in a GPS, which she called by some trucker slang I've already forgotten. I learned alot that night, probably more then I wanted to, but certainly some stuff that will score me knowledge points at some junction in the future across this country.
So much to write about! Whew! Our family has been separated for the last 5 weeks - the boys were in NJ with their dad for three weeks, then because of un-mentioned situations, Jay could not drive them down on the set date, and he told me late the evening before - so because I couldn't make it another day without my boys, Matthew and I (I being the driver, but it's amazing the difference there is driving 10 hours solo with 3 kids and driving the same route with 1 kid and another adult. . .) booked it straight up to NJ, got the boys, left Mercury, and headed straight back down to TN. Less then 30 hours, and man - what a testimony to my kids' strength and flexibility and finesse. We crashed in a Maryland rest stop on the way back, and Ezekiel awoke at dawn shortly after I did, with the biggest smile on his face. These kids are meant for the crazy life. We had quite an adventurous journey back, all positive.
And now I am waiting for my new used powerbook i thing. I was corrected yesterday that it was indeed NOT an ibook. That was what died. Yet another little detour on my way out of here - I was blessed by being let go of my day job a month ago - it was not ideal anyway, and logistically, I probably wasn't even making any money considering the commute and the time with sitters. . .it was sudden and I texted my boss, telling her bluntly that it was inconsiderate to tell me that my job ended with only one day of warning. I received a check for 5 times what she owed me in the mail a few days later. That right there payed for my new used computer. The only problem is - the previous owner STILL hasn't mailed it, it being about 2 weeks overdue. Very frustrating, especially because I have so many photos and words to slap up here. And when it gets to be a three page post, you're going to get bored. But I guarantee that the last month has been anything but around here.
I've also been busy making eyes at Matthew. Which accounts for alot of 'lost' time. . .
I will be back at the library soon. For now I'm heading back home to freak out about leaving such a beautiful home. . .one of the nicest things at the end of a long road trip is knowing you have a shower and comfortable bed and AC and, oh yeah, space. . .I will admit this - it's seeming much more like a trial then an exciting prospect as the physical reality takes shape.
Oh, and there was the inccident of a failed attempt to recreate the shadows of some birch tree leaves on the bus at night with some Sharpie oil markers by Charlotte and Garret. . .sigh. Their hearts were in it. . .
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